AiG Scientists Tackle the Important Issues

Posted 27 March 2007 by Steve Reuland

Answers In Genesis is getting set to open their new Creation Museum, the one that is so well placed it's miraculously within a 6-hours' drive of 2/3rds of the American population. But it's not all fun and games. Trying to figure out how to cram Earth history into 6000 years, how to cram thousands of species onto a wooden Ark, and how to cram all this nonsense down people's throats can be hard work. That's why they've called in a team of crack scientists to resolve some of the hairier issues. One of the museum's scriptwriters explains:

In designing a museum for the next generation, we clearly understood from the start that we had to be forward thinking, to gather the latest research, and to imagine where science will be five years from now. We needed a science reference board, made up of some of the very best experts in every field.

And what are these best experts working on?

"Based on genetics, I think Adam's chest hair needs to be short, like Sean Connery's." The conversations with scientists were never dull. In one memorable discussion, a sixty-something college professor threw back his chair, jumped up, then started lumbering about like an ape to explain how a monkey walks.

Decades of education and research have clearly paid off.

24 Comments

Mike Elzinga · 27 March 2007

"Mike Matthews earned a B.A in English and an M.Ed. in English Education from Bob Jones University and worked for a number of years in Christian publishing before joining the staff of AiG as a writer and editor. Mike now has the responsibility of director of content development at AiG's Creation Museum."

He says in his article that he was once a lowly freshman at the University of Chicago. Apparently didn't graduate from there and is now "director of content development." Sounds like really high power to me. ;-) He apparently was responsible for the "content" of the article.

rountree · 27 March 2007

The "6 hour drive" bit is getting a little old. Consulting the Wayback Machine for the Creation Museum FAQ shows that the first version said

"About 2/3 of America's population can drive to the Cincinnati area in one day!"

way back in 2001. The only change has been the addition of

"(within a 650-mile drive)".

Ken Ham has stated:

"The greater Cincinnati area is within a one-day drive and 1 Â¼-hour flight of two thirds of America's population, so, demographically, it is a phenomenal place to be."

And yes, lots of little (and not so little) towns in Ohio, West Virginia, and Kentucky claim to be within a day's drive of two-thirds of the U.S. population. The figure may not have originated with the local chamber of commerce, but it could probably be found there with a bit of digging. Yes, the 6-hour-drive figure is wrong. It's also only been seen in one place to my knowledge: a British newspaper where the writer may have silently equated a "day's drive" to 6 hours. (That bit is no longer in the online version, BTW.) The creationists have enough malicious stupidity and willful ignorance to pound on -- perhaps we could take the high road and forgive them the odd inadvertent and meaningless error. Eh, but then again, we're talking about people who quote-mine professionally. Nevermind.

Steve Reuland · 27 March 2007

As I mentioned in my older post, even if it's a one-day drive, it's still wrong. Someone was nice enough to do a better analysis than me, and found that only 51% of the population lives within a 600 mile radius of that location. And that's straight as the crow flies. The radius at which people could realistically make it within a day's drive is far smaller.

You're right that it's not that big a deal, though I do enjoy giving them grief about it.

Keanus · 27 March 2007

Does anyone know how Ham's museum is organized. Is it a church? A non-profit? A for profit? Presumably it's the latter. If so, how much supervisory authority does the State of Kentucky exercise over such institutions? One would assume that Ham would have taken a cue from Hovind's attempt to fleece the government, but, then, he may think he's smarter than Hovind. Any clues?

Having said that, doesn't the claim by Mike Matthews that the place "...is sure to be the most scrutinized museum on the planet." a bit much? Does he really think it'll draw more than the Smithsonian, the MMNH in NYC, the Field Museum, the British Museum, or the top drawer art museums like the Met, the Louvre, the Prado, or the Tate? He's got some gall to imply that Ham's Ark on the Ohio is even in the same universe.

And given the YEC bias to the place, I'll be curious to see what the DI says about it, once it's up and running. Will they pan it? Try to ignore it? Try to lecture Ham from afar? Throw in the towel and join their compatriot in nonsense?

Keanus · 27 March 2007

I blew it. In my previous post I meant to presume that the museum is organized as a non-profit, not a for-profit institution.

Also in looking over the AIG website, I noticed they have a large posting for open jobs at the museum and AIG. All, including the housekeepers, must provide "Salvation testimony, creation belief statement, and confirmation of your agreement with the AiG Statement of Faith." I know that's always been standard boiler plate at Bob Jone, Liberty, and Regent, so I guess it's to be expected at a place that bills itself as a science museum. But for the housekeeping staff?

tacitus · 27 March 2007

I believe Ham's ministry is non-profit, and I don't think there has been a whiff of an financial scandal associated with the group. There was a bust up with another group of creationists who I think are based in his home country of Australia, but that was over policy, not anything illegal.

You can make a very nice living as a creationist when your as gifted a communicator as Ken Ham (think snake oil salesman). Raising money for his museum was simply a matter of time and much effort on his part. With nearly half the country sympathetic to his cause, there were plenty of willing donors out there, he just had to find them.

Hovind got into trouble because he is seriously deluded when it comes to his "Biblical understanding" of rendering unto Caesar. He had plenty of money already to lead a comfortable life without trying to cheat the IRS, but he did so anyway.

Karen · 27 March 2007

Does he really think it'll draw more than the Smithsonian, the MMNH in NYC, the Field Museum

Keanus, Don't you mean the AMNH (American Museum of Natural History)? I think you're right about the numbers-- the AiG won't be able to draw the same crowds that the top science museums get. The AMNH was voted by the Zagat Survey as the most popular destination in New York City, and the 3rd most popular one in the whole U.S.A. (And its reputation is richly deserved, I might add.) The AiG Museum sounds like an Easter bunny-- Lovely on the outside, hollow on the inside.

k.e. · 27 March 2007

"Based on genetics, I think Adam's chest hair needs to be short, like Sean Connery's."

Bwhahhahahahahahahaha A girl wrote that right?

minimalist · 27 March 2007

No, a SCIENTIST wrote it. Can't you tell? It's all sciencey and stuff, based on the most cutting edge research no doubt. Why, he even used the word "genetics"!

PS: Steve Reuland, that picture is PERFECT. Zardoz is a movie everyone should watch once in their lifetime.

Anton Mates · 28 March 2007

In one memorable discussion, a sixty-something college professor threw back his chair, jumped up, then started lumbering about like an ape to explain how a monkey walks.

I guess the most charitable way to read this is that Mike Matthews wasn't paying very much attention to the professor in question.

David Edwards · 28 March 2007

The conversations with scientists were never dull. In one memorable discussion, a sixty-something college professor threw back his chair, jumped up, then started lumbering about like an ape to explain how a monkey walks.

Another English literature major perchance? * Snerk * Despite what I said in another comment in another thread, the thought occurs to me here "give them enough rope ..." Better still, that should be "sell them the rope" so that they've less money to waste on their PR machine. The comparisons with Zardoz are interesting. If I recall correctly from seeing that film, you had dysfunctional societies comprised of people living out assorted spaced-out fantasies, presumably as a result of having undergone a catastrophic descent of the kind that the creationists wish to visit upon us. Perhaps they all have a secret yearning to be Sean Connery in that oversized orange nappy. Fitting for individuals who are stuck in a world of intellectual babyhood. Wonder if the AiG is going to team up with the Fixed Earth crowd? Now that would be a comedy spectacle too good to miss. I'd also like to see how they try and second-guess where science is going in the next five years, given that [1] their illiteracy on the subject is stunning to behold, and [2] most of the actual genuine scientists working in the fields of interest would probably tell anyone who asked that making predictions about what's going to turn up in the next five years is likely to be as fraught with idiot traps as any other attempt at predicting the future. There are ideas that have surfaced in the world of physics in the last five years that were probably undreamt of prior to that (ideas which, incidentally, are going to be quite a bombshell once they filter through to the general public) and I suspect the biologists haven't been sitting on their hands either. Incidentally, I'd move for a change of title here. The idea of an AiG "scientist" is an oxymoron surely.

fusilier · 28 March 2007

Everyone knows there is a real science museum in Cincy, right?

http://www.cincymuseum.org/explore_our_sites/natural_history/

fusilier
James 2:24

2Hulls · 28 March 2007

A recommendation for a bumper sticker to sell in the gift shop:

"This car went to The Creation Museum
It's UNBELIEVABLE!!!"

Yuk, yuk.

Raging Bee · 28 March 2007

Can I puke now?

Peter · 28 March 2007

Wow!! That was so much scientific sciencey science that I can hardly contain myself. Little did I know that Adam's chesthair was so akin to Sean Connery's!!! Wow!!! Thanks sciencey scientists!!!
Check this one out:
The challenge for Mike Matthews, director of content development, was to find the best combination of videos, audio, and scenes that would stir hearts---not just give facts---about the history of God's work of redemption.
Geee!!!! What great science that is!!! All those hearts being stirred up for the Lord so that we can learn about how people shared Lebensraum with the high Jurassic...err...3,000 B.C. time era portion thing with Diplodocus!!!
Look at those panels you can buy!!! Those velociraptors sure are well-behaved huh? Geee. God does such neat stuff.

Peter Henderson · 28 March 2007

Answers In Genesis is getting set to open their new Creation Museum, the one that is so well placed it's miraculously within a 6-hours' drive of 2/3rds of the American population.

Some time ago I drove from Holywood, Co.Down: http://www.britinfo.net/index_Holywood.htm All the way to Clifden in Connemara: http://www.connemara-tourism.org/regions/clifden.html We set of at around 11.00 a.m. stopping, just over the border for lunch (about 45 minutes). We also had a meal in Westport (another 1hr), http://westport.mayo-ireland.ie/ finally arriving at our destination around 9.30 pm. Given that we didn't even drive the full length of Ireland, I reckon AiG's claim is just plain silly, as Steve has said. As for the Sean Connery chest hair, I wonder if Eve will look like Ursela Andress ? http://www.cedmagic.com/featured/007/dn-2-0409-honey-ryder.jpg Still, I've heard Ken Ham pontificating that the pre-flood climate was very similar to that of the Virgin Islands today ! Ham has also stated that on his last trip to Belfast in 2005, many people came up to him and said they were going to visit the museum when it opens. I have no doubts that this is true !

jasonmitchell · 28 March 2007

Keanus-
Answers in Genesis (AiG) is an independent 501(c)(3) nonprofit ministry organization. (whatever that means)

Andrew Chase · 28 March 2007

Next, the museum tries to prove that the Earth is flat and is the center of the universe.

And we wonder why the rest of the world laughs at us!

Henry J · 29 March 2007

Re "Next, the museum tries to prove that the Earth is flat and is the center of the universe."

Hmm. Aren't those two claims inconsistent with each other?

David Edwards · 29 March 2007

Henry, you mean the staffed building version of the Fixed Earth website perchance?

Mind you, given what they keep saying about the whole of Western science being an Evil Jewish Conspiracyâ„¢, I suspect the Anti-Defamation League would put a stop to that pretty quickly ...

Henry J · 29 March 2007

No, I was just referring to having a flat object as the center of something. But on second thought, if a Flat-Earth-believer accepts that the universe is a good bit larger than the Earth, I guess the flat earth could be presumed to be in the middle of it. So never mind my previous comment.

Henry

stevaroni · 29 March 2007

Evil Jewish Conspiracyâ„¢,

I've always wondered why everybody's worried about the whole Jewish Conspiracy thing. They're obviously not very good at it. I sure know that if I were the hidden puppetmaster that controlled the world, I certainly wouldn't pick out a tiny, arid speck of land, with no significant energy or mineral resources other than salt, limited ports and trade opportunities and little arable land, where it would be difficult to carve out a thriving economy even if it weren't and surrounded by hostile enemies, as my homeland. I think I would have picked, oh, maybe Brazil. But hey - that's just me.

stevaroni · 29 March 2007

tOops, typo.

Should have been...

" even if it weren't surrounded by hostile enemies... "

a superfluous "and" mutated in.

Chinchillazilla · 7 April 2007

Connery has short chest hair? I'd go with 'long and wooly' or even 'yak-like', personally.

(Nothing against you, Sean, as you're a great actor.)