Alabama Rejects Textbooks Containing Evolution

Betty Peters said she had hoped to see the textbooks discuss alternative theories of life, including creationism and intelligent design, in addition to evolution. She said that despite the disclaimer, many teachers are still afraid to teach about theories that are not included in textbooks... .

Isn't it somewhat telling that this is happening in what is arguably the dumbest state in the union?

Play It All Night Long by Warren Zevon

Christians shouldn't pretend that science isn't real.

Case Study Number 1:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20051031/ap_on_re_us/pastor_electrocuted;_ylt=At8BcjviCY.Md_4IeCy9neCs0NUE;_ylu=X3oDMTA3b2NibDltBHNlYwM3MTY

WACO, Texas - A pastor performing a baptism was electrocuted inside his church Sunday morning after grabbing a microphone while partially submerged, a church employee said.

The Rev. Kyle Lake, 33, was standing in water up to his shoulder in a baptismal at University Baptist Church when he was electrocuted, said Jamie Dudley, a church business administrator and wife of another pastor there.

...

Pastors at University Baptist Church routinely use a microphone during baptisms, Dudley said.

"He was grabbing the microphone so everyone could hear," Dudley said. "It's the only way you can be loud enough."

"WACO, Texas - A pastor performing a baptism was electrocuted inside his church Sunday morning after grabbing a microphone while partially submerged, a church employee said."

Don't know why they would be upset, after all, God just called him home. God obviously had other plans for him.
/shrug

obviously a candidate for a Darwin award...

http://www.darwinawards.com

/snark off...

Mr/ms. Bouffant gave me an idea of how to promote evolution to the masses and that would be an evolution C.D. Im sure lots of you science-nerds-who-never-had-a-real-life have listened to an avagadro's# worth of songs and could help flush out a worthwhile disc. For starters: Big Gorilla (Warren Zevon), Apeman (Kinks) and Monkey Man (Toots & the Maytals). Perhaps even Lenny????..nah he probably prefers the Moron Tabernacle Choir.

Christians shouldn't pretend that science isn't real. Case Study Number 1: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20051031/ap_on_re_us/... WACO, Texas - A pastor performing a baptism was electrocuted inside his church Sunday morning after grabbing a microphone while partially submerged, a church employee said....

— Registered User

God speaks in mysterious ways. I think this time God was saying, "buy a cordless microphone."

Betty Peters: What difference would that make?

The book "Geologic Time" (Perfection Learning Company) was rejected for an illustrated diagram that shows humans evolving from apes.

I assume this figure doesn't show a human evolving from a modern ape. Anybody seen it?

And speaking of illustrations, here is one dedicated to Betty "Ahm Ah Stoopid Idgit" Peters, which shows the "intelligent design" model for the evolution of the genes encoding the bacterial flagella:

-----------------------

Bacterial genome before flagellum ===>

POOF!

===> Bacterial genome plus all the flagellar genes and all the signal transduction pathway genes which encode proteins used to control flagellar motion and chemotaxis

-----------------------

Copyright 2005, Registered User

Note: In the actual figure, the "POOF" is scratch 'n' sniffable aso the excited student will discover a faint aroma of myrhh upon rubbing his or her fingernail across the text.

The state motto here in Alabama is "Thank God for Mississippi". Thanks to Mississippi, Alabama only ranks second-last in most important quality of life measures, such as education. Still, Judge Roy Moore is a formidable candidate for governor; his Republican opponent tried to raise taxes (only Mississippi's are more regressive or inadequate), and his most likely Democratic challenger was recently indicted in ethics charges...

I will say this, though. Taxes are low. Two or three school districts are outstanding (in the state). And if you don't like what the public schools are doing (see the Onion), you have a very large selection of private and home schools to choose from, all of which are run entirely by REAL Christians, not them liberal Yankee Christians.

Is it too late to let Alabama secede?

The state textbook committee Thursday recommended dozens of science textbooks to be approved by the state school board for Alabama students, but rejected three elementary-level books for containing material on evolution which was deemed "controversial" for that age group.

I wonder which age groups evolution is not considered too controversial for.

Ask Slaveador Cordova. He's an expert at determining when the human brain is still soft enough to be washed productively.

R.U.

The Parents just don't want to deal with niggly little questions like

"Mommy, why didn't god tell GWB to build an Ark for all those people in New Orleans ?"

"Is it true the Great Wall of China was built by dragons ?"

You know, easy stuff like
1. God lost GWB's phone number.
2. Yes.

Since when was controversial redefined to mean "something me and my Jeebus-loving friends don't like"?

As Flint Says, low taxes. Teaching creationism is sufficiently cheap enough for all peasants to have an education. I suspect that the local captains of industry and the Pastor's children will have absolutely first-rate education and medical services. Perhaps it should be explained to the peasants that too much actual knowledge is dangerous for them. *THAT* will make them feel better.

Rustopher.

Is it too late to let Alabama secede?

Jim Jones second comming

Im sure lots of you science-nerds-who-never-had-a-real-life have listened to an avagadro's# worth of songs and could help flush out a worthwhile disc. For starters: Big Gorilla (Warren Zevon), Apeman (Kinks) and Monkey Man (Toots & the Maytals). Perhaps even Lenny????..nah he probably prefers the Moron Tabernacle Choir.

Each of the three elementary books rejected contained "controversial material at a grade level that is not developmentally ready for such controversial material,"

Thereby admitting that creationism is fit only for the childish and the ignorant, and that anyone with ability will eventually grow out of it.
.

Interesting that they are advertising "Hurricane-Proof" homes at the Christian Exodus website. Presumably when they have created their own Bantustan these won't be neccessary as the faithful will be able to call on God to steer hurricanes away from South Carolina. Come to think of it God can't really like the Deep South that much since that's where he sends the hurricane in the first place; and spares all the Sodomites in California and New England.

As Flint Says, low taxes. Teaching creationism is sufficiently cheap enough for all peasants to have an education. I suspect that the local captains of industry and the Pastor's children will have absolutely first-rate education and medical services. Perhaps it should be explained to the peasants that too much actual knowledge is dangerous for them. *THAT* will make them feel better.

If we're gonna collect tunes for the "human evolution" compilation, there's no way we can leave out Elvis Costello's "Monkey to Man".

the pro from dover wrote: "Mr/ms. Bouffant gave me an idea of how to promote evolution to the masses and that would be an evolution C.D. Im sure lots of you science-nerds-who-never-had-a-real-life have listened to an avagadro's# worth of songs and could help flush out a worthwhile disc."

Jefferson Airplane had a song, "Crown of Creation":

You are the Crown of Creation
You are the Crown of Creation
and you've got no place to go.

Soon you'll attain the stability you strive for
in the only way that it's granted
in a place among the fossils of our time.

In loyalty to their kind
they cannot tolerate our minds.
In loyalty to our kind
we cannot tolerate their obstruction.

Life is Change
How it differs from the rocks
I've seen their ways too often for my liking
New worlds to gain
My life is to survive
and be alive
for you.

Can't the United States give aid to underdeveloped Third World Countries like Alabama?

Re "Is it too late to let Alabama secede?"

Hey, one of my brothers lives there! Oh well.

Henry

Each of the three elementary books rejected contained "controversial material at a grade level that is not developmentally ready for such controversial material," according to a series of Sept. 28 memos sent to school board members.

Wait, I thought we learned from Dover that you need to teach the controversy. Or does that apply only to high school students?

spares all the Sodomites in California

naw, we get all the fires, floods, and earthquakes instead. :p

spares all the Sodomites in California

The new Hym for Alabama

"All Things Dull And Ugly" from Monty Python's Contractual Obligations Album

All things dull and ug-ly,
All creatures, short and squat,
All things rude and na-sty,
The Lord God made the lot.

Each little snake that poisons,
Each little wasp that stings,
He made their prudish venom,
He made their horrid wings.

All things sick and cancerous,
All evil great and small,
All things foul and dangerous,
The Lord God made them all.

Each nasty little hornet,
Each beastly little squid,
Who made the spiky urchin?
Who made the sharks? He did!

All things scant and ulcerous,
All pox both great and small,
Putrid, foul and gangrenous,
The Lord God made them all.

Amen.

Come to think of it God can't really like the Deep South that much since that's where he sends the hurricane in the first place

A musical nod to the other side;

"They tell us that
We lost our tails
Evolving up
From little snails.
I say it's all
Just wind in sails.
Are we not men?
We are Devo.
Are we not men?
D-E-V-O."

;>

between monkey to man and the guiness commercial not to mention the pastor-who-forgot-ben franklin this hasn't been a bad week. What CD is that song from? Any other entries?

hhehehehehehehe here's one

The Galaxy Song from the "Meaning of Life"

http://www.mwscomp.com/sounds/mp3/galaxy.mp3

Whenever life get you down, Mrs. Brown
And things seem hard or tough
And people are stupid, obnoxious or daft
And you feel that you've had quite enu-hu-hu-huuuuff
.
.
.
.
.
.
So remember, when you're feeling very small and insecure
How amazingly unlikely is your birth
And pray that there's intelligent life somewhere up in space
Because there's bugger all down here on Earth

boom boom

.... Each little wasp that stings, He made their prudish venom, He made their horrid wings. ....Each nasty little hornet.....

Well, I like rabbits :)

But seriously if one is to accept natural theology/creationism then every single thing must be accepted as created.
While science can neither disprove nor prove a supernatural creator, science can say that supernatural forces do not act on nature.
So to accept a supernatural creator all the creationists need to say is the whole damn thing is supernatural. I can see where they get their crackpot morality from if that is their view.
The created ones can have their created cake but they must invoke the creator to eat it too the only thing divine about that process is that they must thank the creator for the cake.

....that brings to mind the Hindu greeting "Namasthe"

Where the hands are placed together and the head is bowed as an act of humility when greeting one another.'The God in me greets the God in you
The Spirit in me meets the same Spirit in you'

The whole act of Namasthe communicates to the world, YOU AND I ARE ONE. I SALUTE YOU AND HONOR THE GOD WITHIN YOU, WHICH IS A MIRROR IMAGE OF MYSELF.

A similar entreaty is performed at the Catholic Mass. The Church of England is experimenting with positive religious teachings outside of the 'normal' reference.

http://www.qca.org.uk/1592_2516.html

We will see more of this, even outside the bible belt, as long as evolutionists maintain their hubris in claiming macroevolution as a fact. In maintaining their anti-intellectual stance, they encourage the anti-intellectual dopes on the other side to step up their actions. Stupidity begets...

We should not teach macroevolution as fact, and should allow dissenting views, including ID. Muahahaha.

Seeker I said God in you not stupidity

We should not teach macroevolution as fact

— seeker

We should allow dissenting views, including ID.

— seeker

Assuming you're not simply parodying an IDer

Seeker is not parodying anything except of course the obvious, himself.

Nicely picked up, Red Mann. I and I boldly assume Grey Wolf seem to place science and no-superstitious religion above politics not a good tactic. Back to the "Art of War" for more answers in history.

This is the subtitle of Seeker's web site: "Christian perspectives on living, worship, worldviews and politics" I don't think he's parodying anything.

— Red Mann

K.E. in comment #54548 touches on something that I've wondered about regarding criticism of ID: if ID purports to distinguish between something that is designed and something that is NOT designed, that assumes the existence of a class of things that are "NOT designed". Doesn't the Bible teach that God created ALL things? Shouldn't "design" be detectable in everything, everywhere, everywhen?

Is this discrepancy a worthwhile criticism of ID, or have I missed their "explanation" of it?

Doesn't the Bible teach that God created ALL things? Shouldn't "design" be detectable in everything, everywhere, everywhen?

— Joe

Grey Wolf Beat me to it.
Faith precludes detecting design otherwise faith is called into question on specifics.
If the Bible says God created ALL things then the only question left is, does God create NOW? A question I am not ambivalent about since the only theology that makes sense to me is Zen.
Political-theology ebbs and flows on natural theology/creationism it can ebb when Galileo is finally let off the hook in our lifetime by the Catholic Church after 350 years or stay where it was 900 years ago (or now WRT Xian etc) when the radical Mullahs let their ego take over and declared all knowledge (scientific revelation) against the Word of God thus deadening Islam and Arabian science/medicine with which they were world leaders around 1100-1200 AD. Therein lies the problem, I think, in that the creationists and any fundamentalists for that matter assign god an ego that matches their own in their almost desperate hold onto their finite self view of reality.
If Christ tried to teach anything it was not to remain ignorant.

How bout a devolution song... Nothing but Flowers (Talking Heads)

Here we stand
Like an Adam and an Eve
Waterfalls
The Garden of Eden
Two fools in love
So beautiful and strong
The birds in the trees
Are smiling upon them
From the age of the dinosaurs
Cars have run on gasoline
Where, where have they gone?
Now, it's nothing but flowers

There was a factory
Now there are mountains and rivers
you got it, you got it

We caught a rattlesnake
Now we got something for dinner
we got it, we got it

There was a shopping mall
Now it's all covered with flowers
you've got it, you've got it

If this is paradise
I wish I had a lawnmower
you've got it, you've got it

Years ago
I was an angry young man
I'd pretend
That I was a billboard
Standing tall
By the side of the road
I fell in love
With a beautiful highway
This used to be real estate
Now it's only fields and trees
Where, where is the town
Now, it's nothing but flowers
The highways and cars
Were sacrificed for agriculture
I thought that we'd start over
But I guess I was wrong

Once there were parking lots
Now it's a peaceful oasis
you got it, you got it

This was a Pizza Hut
Now it's all covered with daisies
you got it, you got it

I miss the honky tonks,
Dairy Queens, and 7-Elevens
you got it, you got it

And as things fell apart
Nobody paid much attention
you got it, you got it

I dream of cherry pies,
Candy bars, and chocolate chip cookies
you got it, you got it

We used to microwave
Now we just eat nuts and berries
you got it, you got it

This was a discount store,
Now it's turned into a cornfield
you got it, you got it

Don't leave me stranded here
I can't get used to this lifestyle

Or a good dino song... Walking in Your Footsteps (The Police)

Walking In Your Footsteps
Fifty million years ago
You walked upon the planet so
Lord of all that you could see
Just a little bit like me

Walking in your footsteps

Hey, Mr. Dinosaur, you really couldn't ask for more
You were God's favorite creature, but you didn't have a future

Walking in your footsteps

Hey mighty brontosaurus, don't you have a lesson for us
You thought your rule would always last
There were no lessons in your past
You were built three stories high
They say you would not hurt a fly
If we explode the atom bomb they would say that we were dumb

Walking in your footsteps

Fifty million years ago
They walked upon the planet so
They live in a museum
It's the only place you'll see 'em

Walking in your footsteps

They say the meek shall inherit the earth

Walking in your footsteps

Is this discrepancy a worthwhile criticism of ID, or have I missed their "explanation" of it?

now ive got a total of 10 songs for my evolution CD with these 2 Alley Oop (Hollywood Argyles) and Mammal (They might Be Giants) any others? Kudos to all who have contributed! TPFD.

We should not teach macroevolution as fact

and should allow dissenting views, including ID

Hey pro, here's another Talking Heads song. David Byrne wrote quite a few songs about evolution, in fact he wrote a whole album, Naked. It even has a chimpanzee on the cover. It has been one of my favorite albums since it came out.

The Facts Of Life Lyrics(Talking Heads)

Mon key see and mon key do
Ma king ba bies, ea ting food
Smel ly things, pu bic hair
Words of lo ve, in the air
Sparks fly, shoo ting out
Ma king sure that eve ry thing is wor king
I can't turn you down
We are pro grammed hap py lit tle chil dren
Mat ter o ver mind
We can not re sis so I won't fight it
Love is a ma chine
Love is a ma chine without a dri ver
The facts of life
The facts of life
A masterpiece
Biology
Smokey water
Air conditioned
Boys 'n' girls
And automation
Chromosomes
Designer jeans
Chimpanzees
And human beings
Machines of love
Machines of love
Strong in body, strong in mind
A love machine with the facts of life
The facts of life
The facts of life
So much sex 'n' violence
Must be a bad design
We're stupid to be fighting
Every night
The monsters we create
They welcome us aboard
The best in advertising
From coast to coast
The girls and boys combine
Like monkeys in the zoo
The clouds have silver linings
Looks pretty good
People fall in love like in fairy tales
I'm not sure I like, what they can do
I'm afraid that God has no master plan
He only takes -- what he can use
Factory life, ice cream & pie
Factory life
Someday we'll live on Venus
And men will walk on Mars
But we will still be monkeys
Down deep inside
If chimpanzees are smart
Then we will close our eyes
And let our instincts guide us
Oh oh oh oh no

I've been told that one of the curriculium committee appointed by the governor has claimed in a committee meeting that the Russians can control hurricanes with technology seized at the end of WWII. Apparantly he got the idea from an Idaho weatherman.

This has got to be the best musical answer to creationism ever.

The Word of God

Lyrics and melody © 1994 by Catherine Faber

From desert cliff and mountaintop we trace the wide design,
Strike-slip fault and overthrust and syn and anticline. . .
We gaze upon creation where erosion makes it known,
And count the countless aeons in the banding of the stone.
Odd, long-vanished creatures and their tracks & shells are found;
Where truth has left its sketches on the slate below the ground.
The patient stone can speak, if we but listen when it talks.
Humans wrote the Bible; God wrote the rocks.

There are those who name the stars, who watch the sky by night,
Seeking out the darkest place, to better see the light.
Long ago, when torture broke the remnant of his will,
Galileo recanted, but the Earth is moving still.
High above the mountaintops, where only distance bars,
The truth has left its footprints in the dust between the stars.
We may watch and study or may shudder and deny,
Humans wrote the Bible; God wrote the sky.

By stem and root and branch we trace, by feather, fang and fur,
How the living things that are descend from things that were.
The moss, the kelp, the zebrafish, the very mice and flies,
These tiny, humble, wordless things---how shall they tell us lies?
We are kin to beasts; no other answer can we bring.
The truth has left its fingerprints on every living thing.
Remember, should you have to choose between them in the strife,
Humans wrote the Bible; God wrote life.

And we who listen to the stars, or walk the dusty grade,
Or break the very atoms down to see how they are made,
Or study cells, or living things, seek truth with open hand.
The profoundest act of worship is to try to understand.
Deep in flower and in flesh, in star and soil and seed,
The truth has left its living word for anyone to read.
So turn and look where best you think the story is unfurled.
Humans wrote the Bible; God wrote the world.

There's an MP3 at http://www.prometheus-music.com/audio/wordgod.mp3

if I understand the I.D. proposition, I could answer Lenny by saying obviously my right knee was created but my left knee evolved which explains why it looks like a grapefruit.